The past few days have been incredibly tough. Nothing in particular has caused it, unfortunately just the way things are. Still up and down. This emotional roller-coaster is horrible. I have had a migraine for over 5 weeks now which isn’t helping. Yet still plenty to do.
There always will be plenty to do especially when I can’t bring myself to do anything. Day after day I sit here ignoring everything that needs doing. It takes all my effort and concentration to get through each day, that’s without having the ability to do anything else. But the kids are still clothed, fed and going to school.
I read this article, it summarises and sort of answers a lot that is going on.
https://www.anonews.co/14-signs-of-concealed-depression-to-look-out-for-in-family-and-friends/
Just wish there was a way of coping and dealing with this quicker so I have the chance of trying to be ‘me’ again. I was told I am nothing like i used to be, a shadow of my former self. I see this too, but struggling to do anything about it.
The brightest star in the sky 
Dude, I’ve not had to go through anything approaching what you’re working your way through, but I don’t think there are any shortcuts – I don’t say it lightly (the last thing you need is some online stranger glibly saying “aaah, you’ll be all right” – that is emphatically not me), I don’t say that to add to your burdens, I say it to mean “this too shall pass”. It will not be quick, and I don’t think it’s something that can be speeded up, but it will pass – there won’t, I don’t think, be an epiphany, a breakthrough moment (can you tell I’m not a counsellor? 🙂 ) but life goes on. I so, so wish there was a way to ease or speed it through but please please please keep clothing the kids, feeding the kids, taking them to school – and at some point, go and speak to someone about you, too. Keeping the kids fuelled and moving is crucial, of course – but you’ve got to take care of you. I don’t doubt you’ve heard all this before, but please don’t dismiss it – again, I don’t say it lightly. The migraines are absolutely something you could do without at the moment, so get that checked out, and you’ve got that link to the depression website and you’ve identified with bits of it – give the docs a bell and get booked in (I think most GPs will allow lengthier appointments if you tell reception you’ve got more than one “thing” to talk to the GP about). And please, please keep writing – there are people out here reading, and they’re all wishing nothing but the best for you all.
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